How to Maintain a Positive Thinking as a Helper
How to Maintain a Positive Thinking as a Helper
Our negative thoughts or the gremlins of our minds are sometimes the causes of our unproductivity and hesitations. Normally, the problem roots down not on our negative thoughts, but on our beliefs that these ‘gremlins’ are true. In the case of our live-in maids in Singapore, these negative thoughts become the reasons why they can’t finish their contracts.
The Indonesian maid or Filipino maid must understand how negative thoughts affect their work, their lives, and their career.
Here are four ways we think negatively:
1. Magnifying the negativity in every situation.
After a day of cleaning the employer’s house and taking care of the children, the employer went home and was pleased with the result of the helper’s work. She complimented her work and tells her that she made a good job. In the evening, however, the Indo maid or Filipino maid was stressed about the new things to be done on the following day, forgetting all the compliments she has heard earlier that day. This happens when we let negativity outweigh the good things.
2. Being too perfectionist and feeling like a failure.
For the Indo maid or Filipino maid with negative thoughts, it’s perfection or failure only, there’s nothing in between. Sometimes, the live-in maid feels like she isn’t good enough at work, she ends up feeling like a total failure. It could also be the same on how she sees her children’s school performance at home or how she views the slow completion of success.
3. Blaming oneself for everything.
From the children’s poor behaviour to the unfinished housework, the Indo maid or Filipino maid just sees everything as her fault. When something at home or in the house of the employer goes wrong, she immediately blames herself for it, not recognizing that the disaster has many factors too.
4. Expecting the worst always.
This is the kind of negative thinking that can prevent the Indo maid or Filipino maid from having a positive disposition. When something is delayed or a small inconvenience happens, the maid always expects the next thing to become bad or disastrous. For example, her spouse at home didn’t reply on time, so she thinks her husband is being unfaithful or something bad has happened to him. For the rest of the day, she will be left overthinking about what could have happened.
How to free yourself from negative thoughts?
Surround yourself with positive people.
Maybe the positive thoughts came from what surrounds you or what you often hear as a helper. Choose friends who have the same goals as you and be close to those who are cheerful and hardworking! Negative people only increases your stress level and gives you doubts.
Trusted agencies like Eden Grace Maids Agency organizes quarterly fun activities for all its Indonesian maids and Filipino maids. The agency knows how important it is for your helpers to have a healthy support group in Singapore! Every Sunday, Eden Grace also designs integrated program or mentorship program for the helpers to learn and have good friends.
Take the negative as a challenge.
Learning a new recipe can be difficult and it needs a lot of hardwork. For you, as an Indo maid or Filipino maid, the difficulty is more because you don’t have an idea how a Chinese food should taste like. No matter how bad your cooking is, it is important to never stop learning and improving yourself. Always take the negative comments as an area you need to improve.
Your distance from the family is also a negative aspect of working as a live-in maid in Singapore. But when you take it as a challenge for you and your children to grow independently, it could somehow shoo away the negative thoughts.
Distinguish the bad thought from reality.
You think something bad is going on, but it doesn’t mean that something bad is really happening. Psychology Today says that we should always label our thoughts. Instead of saying, “I’m a failure.” Tell yourself that, “I’m having a thought that I’m a failure. Instead of saying, “My children are not safe.” Tell yourself that you’re only worrying. Label the negative thought as a thought instead of immediately seeing it as a reality.
Talk it over with someone.
Talk to someone you trust and tell them your negative thoughts. Talking about what worries you is an act of emptying yourself. Venting out it all out to someone somehow frees your find from all of it. If the negative thought involves a person, if possible, talk to the person too. It helps the Indo maid or Filipino maid from assuming and thinking negatively.
The family’s health and safety should be the top priority. Eden Grace Maids Agency offers maid services which will help us secure our children’s safety when we’re not around. The choice to hire a maid who can take care of the tiring household chores and things we cannot handle on our own will definitely be a plus point!